I know many people don't understand the M/s dynamic. They think that those of us who participate in these types of relationships are sick, perverse, crazy etc. They think that as women we are weak, being taken advantage of and have low self-esteem. (Sorry I can't speak for the male subs/slaves out there but I'm sure people say similar things).
As I've posted previously, these ideas are even present in so called "kink friendly" books when authors have a bias that she or he just can't shake. It's no wonder so many people hide their kinky side or feel that there must be something wrong with them when they first find these feelings emerge. Its hard to find positive portrayals of bdsm relationships. I am so thankful for the blogger out there who share their positive stories and bring bdsm and sub/Dom feelings out of the dungeon to share with others.
There are so many positive aspects to my relationship with Master. He has taught me so much and enriched my life in so many ways. It makes me crazy to think that so many would condemn it as sick. Master has helped me to trust, to let go of insecurities, to enjoy the moment. He has taught me acceptance of the submissive side of myself and shown me that to be a Dom/Master doesn't mean you have to be a manipulative, hurtful jerk.
I don't find myself weaker or with lower self esteem as a result of my M/s relationship in fact I feel more confident, more at ease with who I am. I am able to stop being such a control freak and let go of more things. My relationship has enabled me to realize that my need for control is really an insecurity, and by letting go I am actually more in control than when I try to micromanage.
In learning to surrender I have learned so much about myself. My inner struggles and ultimate surrender during training lessons with Master can often teach me so much about how I relate to situations outside of my relationship and learn to let things go. Surrender comes in so many forms, can mean so many different things and can teach us so much. In my quest to let go I am finding more happiness because I am not trying to juggle everything around me.
I think when people peel back the layers of the bdsm relationship they will find so much more hidden underneath. Its time for people to unshackle themselves from limiting beliefs and let go.
Daily Mew #136
2 years ago